Sorry I haven’t posted in a while. I know you’re all heartbroken. I haven’t had frequent access to a computer for a while (my laptop fried it’s motherboard), but here’s a short post to make up for it for a little while:
- ultimate frisbee — because then i could tell everyone i’m training for the olympics during pick up games
- ashbourne royal shrovetide football — look it up. its one of the best sports you’ve never heard of.
- the backwards 100m dash — it would be EPIC. let’s see usain bolt prance around after looking like an idiot for 100 meters.
- backwards 100m hurdles — hilarity would most definitely ensue.
- beer pong — it’s the best of the beerfest events, so the real olympics should just adopt it
- tethercat — it’s just like tetherball, but with an angry, wounded cat tied to a string. trained athletes punching a cat? sign me up!
- tug of war — not really all that crazy, but come on, you know you’d watch.
- equestrian diving — also comes in synchronized and i’d actually watch it.
- chainsaw juggling — last one standing wins! makes it to the semifinals!
- that one sport the aztecs used to play waaay back in the day — complete with human sacrifice! don’t end up in the loser’s bracket!
- duck duck goose — needs no explanation
- competitive stripping — because you need to draw in the male demographic.
- summer olympic hockey — let’s see syd the kid skate on WATER!
- competitive WOW — because even the geeks need hope to get into the olympics.
- calvinball — i would win
- competitive lying to small children — another sport i would dominate
- staring contests — i dont know why, but i would find this horrendously compelling
- iron chef-off — it’s already an amazing tv show, imagine if the stakes were a gold medal!
got any other suggestions? add in the comments.
